Category Archives: Gratitude

Believe in Yourself and Know What You Want

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“If you don’t know what you want, it’s difficult—often impossible—to create or to get what you want in life.” Paul J. Meyers

People generally think they know what they want, but in practice, they do not. Generally, they don’t know what they really want in life or want to do. Additionally, they don’t know where to start, don’t have a plan, and don’t where to look for help to change that.

American author Mark Twain said he could teach anyone how to get what they want; he just couldn’t find anyone who truly knew what they wanted. Being unclear on what you want is one of the biggest stumbling blocks to getting what you want and success. Paul Meyer, founder of Success Motivation Institute, says if you’re not achieving the success you desire, it’s simply because your objectives are not clearly defined. Your goals need to be written, specific and measurable.

Hundred of thousands of people live there lives without purpose or goals. If you don’t want to spend your life wandering aimlessly, you should dedicate your waking hours determining exactly what you want in life and making plans to achieve those goals.

“Crystallize your goals. Make a plan for achieving them and set yourself a deadline. Then, with supreme confidence, determination and disregard for obstacles and other people’s criticisms, carry out your plan.” Paul J. Meyer

Knowing what you want.

If you don’t know what you really want in life, you’re not alone. While most people may think they know what they want, they’re often wrong.

Positive mindset, attitude and focus are vitally important attributes. The attributes are required to reach your goals and to realize your dreams. Thus, you should have a real understanding that you are responsible and capable of creating your reality regardless of the various obstacles you might encounter along the way. According to Inc. Magazine, here are six steps to help you achieve what you want:

1. Make a decision to have what you want, even if you don’t know how to get it. Most people are tentative when it comes to being specific. Instead, be confident in declaring what you want and be comfortable with the fact that you don’t yet have a plan, but you do know what you want.

2. Be clear about the details of the outcome. You should focus on what you do want, not what you don’t want. Practice visualizing yourself in the situation you want to create. You must be clear about what you want, like financial freedom, finding the perfect partner or a happy life. You must imagine the look, feel and sound of the perfect situation for you in your life.

3. Detach from the process. Not knowing “how” to do something holds many people back. The “how to do it,” instructions will appear after you have clearly defined what you want.

4. Believe in yourself and expect that it will happen. You need to believe in yourself and in the creative process. Winners expect to win. A shortage of belief causes many people to give up or never begin in the first place. Believe and set an expectation that what you want will, in fact, appear. It may not appear in the way you thought or at the precise time. You may even experience frustration, anxiety or impatience trying to control the outcome.

“When you believe in yourself, others tend to believe in you.” Paul J. Meyers

5. Be open to possibility when things don’t go your way. The path to the outcome may show up in ways you never imagined before. Suspend judgment of how things should be done and consider that the very thing you think is a deterrent may be the very thing you need to get what you want. Many times, people, circumstances and resources will show up, but you’ll miss the connection. This is where not knowing how, while keeping your eye on the goal, is important.

6. Practice gratitude. Be thankful for the things you have in your life right now. Look at your challenges as opportunities to grow. When you practice being thankful for specific events in your life, even when you don’t understand why they appear in your life, your ability to manifest accelerates almost to the speed of thought.

Getting what you want is not always simple and easy. Challenges, emotions, other people’s negative views and comments can set you back. But in the end, it all comes back down to your choice, commitment, effort and most of all…attitude. It’s essential to choose what you want, believe in your abilities, trust the process, have faith that it will happen and embrace the right attitude.

That is why “attitude is everything”.

“Attitude is everything,” according to Meyers. “It doesn’t matter where you are or what you’re doing, it all has to do with attitude. And then I have an I will-not-be denied attitude. And that’s an incredible thing to have. I don’t look to my weakness; I look to my strength. I don’t look to my problems; I look to my power. It’s all about attitude.”

“When winners choose a goal, their commitment to achieving it is firm and steadfast,” says Meyers. “When winners are confronted with hurdles or run into stumbling blocks, they go over them or turn them into stepping stones. Winners pursue their goals persistently until they succeed.”

Every day, you should strive for increased clarity around your goals and knowing what you really want. Having clarity about what you want keeps you moving toward it.

References:

  1. https://ninaamir.com/the-importance-of-knowing-what-you-want/
  2. https://www.lifehack.org/articles/communication/7-ways-find-out-what-you-really-want-life.html
  3. http://successnet.org/cms/goals/top-ten-reasons-people-dont-achieve-their-goals
  4. https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/the-second-noble-truth/201711/you-dont-know-what-you-want
  5. https://www.inc.com/stephanie-frank/6-steps-to-get-anything-you-want-even-if-you-dont-know-how.html
  6. https://www.success.com/paul-j-meyer-what-it-takes-to-be-a-winner/

Life on the Edge

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“As you get older, the days go by quicker and you need to make the time count.” Mary Peachin, Octogenarian

As you age, it becomes more important to “live each day right to the limit”, states octogenarian Mary Peachin, in Costco Connection magazine, September 2021, Members Connection. Peachin has “walk the talk” and lived her life as a self proclaim world-traveling, deep sea diving adrenaline junkie. “If your body aches, you ignore it and keep on trucking”, she preaches.

When it comes to going after what you love in life, do not take no for an answer. You should expect and intend to live a life well lived and always believe the best is yet to come

“Life is too short not to enjoy it.”

Make your life happen and take action today. Be amongst the few who dared to live their dreams. Live your life in such a way that there is no regret.

Time is short; live every day for a higher purpose. Let’s invest the limited time we have on your life’s purpose and mission. Do not focus on your problems and challenges; instead focus on purpose and destination.

Life is brief and it passes quickly. The average American male lives to be 70 years 4 months. The average American female lives 70 years 4 months. To live life to its fullest, it is not the quantity of your life, but the quality.

Time is running out for all of us.

“Your job will not take care of you when your elderly and sick, your friends and family will.”

  1. Select a few friends to be close to in your life and communicate and strengthen your relationship with them
  2. Get over those who disappoint you and refuse to let those people steal your joy
  3. Lift up and encourage those who are recovering from failure. Treat people with Grace.
  4. Ignore your critics. Decide to see the good in the experience and growth, the lessons you learned and the relationships you made.
  5. Stay fully focused on your Lord and Savior Jesus Christ. Believe the best! Christ teaches us to believe the best…faith, hope and love. Remember to rejoice and be glad. If God is for us, who can be against us!

The most effective way to live life on the edge is to “find an edge and Live there”, states Peachin. And, you can start to “find an edge” by writing down your dreams and priorities in life, and then focusing on fulfilling those written dreams and priorities. It starts with knowing what you want, and it ends with getting what you wanted. It’s often that simple.

Save for and invest in the things that matter most!

In every positive or negative situation, there are always options. Remember you are the one pulling the strings, and when things look hopeless, it’s because you’re choosing not look at the things that truly matter. You’re choosing to see the the bad stuff, and they have little to do with your ability to change your circumstances. The trick is that you have to see the ocean of opportunity, not that little bucket of water (problems) that you tripped over.

We must decide to see the good and not dwell on the failure, but instead focus on the positives from the experience. Limits do not exist. You have weaknesses of course and we all do, but focus on your strengths. Remember if you’re feeling scared and fearful, it means you’re trying something new.

People don’t run marathons because it feels good.

When you feel bad about your situation, you’re thinking about the mistakes of yesterday, and not the opportunity of right now and the hope for tomorrow. You’re thinking about what has and what can go wrong, and not what can go right.

When you’re feeling defeated and discouraged, ascertain what you’re really focusing on. It important to focus on how far you’ve come, the opportunities that lie ahead, and the resources available you have to go forward.

“What you focus on expands, and when you focus on the goodness in your life, you create more of it.” Oprah Winfrey

Always think bigger and focus on your purpose. Build the world as you want it to be.

References:

  1. Costco Connection, September 2021, Vol. 36, No. 9, pg. 119
  2. https://personalexcellence.co/blog/101-ways-to-live-your-life-to-the-fullest/

“Those who are the happiest are not necessarily those for whom life has been easiest. Emotional stability results from an attitude. It is refusing to yield to depression and fear, even when black clouds float overhead. It is improving that which can be improved and accepting that which is inevitable.” ― James C. Dobson, Life on the Edge: The Next Generation’s Guide to a Meaningful Future

Emotional Well-being: Gratitude

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“Cultivate the habit of being grateful for every good thing that comes to you, and to give thanks continuously. And because all things have contributed to your advancement, you should include all things in your gratitude.” Ralph Waldo Emerson

November is National Gratitude Month. There is always something on our daily lives to be grateful for.

In the Oxford Dictionary, gratitude is defined as “the quality of being thankful; readiness to show appreciation for and to return kindness.”

Gratitude is about putting our attention towards the positive. When you do that, you help improve your physical and mental well-being. It is one simple way to change one’s perspective of the world. It allows you to appreciate the positive, rather than focus on the negative aspects of your life and the world. Learning to be grateful helps you appreciate the little things in life that you may to take for granted.

Many of people express gratitude by saying “thank you” to someone who has helped them or given them a gift. But from a scientific perspective, gratitude is not just an action: it is also the positive emotion. It’s a state of being, where you feel a sense of appreciation that comes from deep within.

We should try to live everyday showing gratitude and appreciation to one another. Yet, as we get busy and focused on our day-to-day activities, responsibilities, and requirements.

Gratitude can be the same way. It’s not that we don’t feel thankful for things, people, or circumstances in our lives, but sometimes our lives get in the way and we lose focus on being grateful.

Research states that people who practice gratitude every day are not only happier but also healthier. On average, people who are grateful tend to have lower stress-related illnesses, lowered blood pressure, are more physically fit, happier, and have more personal and professional relationships with others.

There are many ways to embrace gratitude. And, it is important to acknowledge something each day that you are grateful for. Here are some other ideas:

  • Start a gratitude journal. Write a quick sentence about someone or something that you were grateful about that day. It can help you find appreciate for things around you, even among the stress from that day. And when you review what you’ve written, you’ll be able to reflect with appreciation those relationships or situations.
  • Say “please” and “thank you.” These simple words go beyond basic manners. They show respect, kindness, appreciation, and acknowledge someone else’s efforts. You could be the one thank you someone received that day.
  • Take the time for mindful reflection. Take a few minutes to focus on the present moment. It can reduce stress and cultivate the ability to be present in the moment and teach you to accept yourself and circumstances.
  • Spread gratitude. Share gratitude with other people. Tell them how much you appreciate their services, care, friendship, etc. Show your family how grateful you are to have them in your life, let them know how they make your life better just by being a part of it.
  • Give back to the community. Show your gratitude and appreciation by giving back to the community. Helping out in the community is a good way to appreciate everything in life. So do your part and become something that others can be grateful for.
  • Wake up and express gratitude for three things every morning. When you wake up each morning, try to immediately think of at least three things you’re grateful for. It can help you get in a positive mindset to start your day. You can express gratitude for something you’re looking forward to that day, or just for simply waking up again.

It’s easy to lose focus on gratitude. It’s t’s easy to forget that even the little things we do have a positive and beneficial impact on our family and friends.

Being grateful means finding and focusing more on the good. It means finding something to be grateful for amid the negative and chaos.

Gratitude has been proven to generate a positive impact on psychological, physical, and personal well-being. Practicing gratitude or reflecting on what you’re grateful for is an effective way to deal with life’s chaotic, stressful and tense moments. Grateful people tend to sleep better, have lower stress levels, exercise more often, and eat healthier.

“Give gratitude a try! You’ll be happier you did.”

References:

  1. https://www.southwesthealth.org/2021/11/a-month-of-gratitude/
  2. https://antimaximalist.com/national-gratitude-month/
  3. https://nationaltoday.com/national-gratitude-month/

Quote: Freedom Involves Risk

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“To laugh is to risk appearing the fool,

To weep is to risk appearing sentimental,

To reach out for another is to risk involvement,

To expose feelings is to risk exposing your true self,

To place ideas and dreams before the crowd is to risk their loss,

To love is to risk not being loved in return,

To live is to risk dying,

To hope is to risk despair,

To try is to risk failure,

But risk must be taken because the greatest hazard in life is to risk nothing. The person who risks nothing, does nothing, has nothing, and is nothing. He may avoid suffering and sorrow, but he simply cannot learn, feel, change, grow, love and live. Chained by certitudes, he is a slave, he has forfeited freedom.

Only a person who risks is free.”

Author Unknown

“Freedom is never free. It requires risk taking.” Nassim Nicholas Taleb.

Humble Leaders Make the Best Leaders

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“A great man is always willing to be little.” Ralph Waldo Emerson

One of the most important traits of top leaders and performers in any organization is humility, according to an article written by Jeff Hyman for Forbes. Yet, humility is not typically the first trait that comes to mind when you think about great business leaders. The idea of a humble, self-effacing leader making the best leader for an organization doesn’t come to mind.

Humility is defined as the act of being humble and as the opposite of narcissism.

“A number of research studies have concluded that humble leaders listen more effectively, inspire great teamwork and focus everyone (including themselves) on organizational goals better than leaders who don’t score high on humility,” Hyman writes.

In the book Good to Great, author Jim Collins found two common traits of CEOs in companies that successfully transitioned from average to superior market performance: “humility and an indomitable will to advance the cause of the organization”.

Further, according to research cited in the Journal of Management, “humble leaders enhance team collaboration, information sharing, and joint decision-making. After examining 105 small-to-medium-sized companies, the researchers discovered that humility and leadership had profound effects on performance. Another study that analyzed nearly 100 business leaders also showed increased team effectiveness when humility and leadership existed side-by-side.”

A recent Catalyst study shows that humility is one of four critical leadership factors for creating an environment where employees from different demographic backgrounds feel more valued and included. In the survey, they found that when employees and team members observed altruistic or selfless behavior in their leaders, they performed measuredly better. The factors are characterized by:

  1. Acts of humility, such as learning from criticism and admitting mistakes;
  2. Empowering followers to learn and develop;
  3. Acts of courage, such as taking personal risks for the greater good;
  4. Holding employees responsible for results.

“Rather than telling employees how to do their jobs better, start by asking them how you can help them do their jobs better.” Daniel Cable, author of Alive at Work

The study raises one universal implication: To promote inclusion and reap its substantial rewards, leaders should embrace a selfless, servant leadership style. Here are the practices to promote inclusivity at one company, Rockwell Automation:

  • Share your mistakes as teachable moments. When humble leaders share their mistakes, they create a culture of continuous learning and growth.
  • Engage in dialogue, not debates…to truly engage with different points of view. Inclusive and humble leaders suspend their own agendas and beliefs
  • Embrace uncertainty. When leaders humbly admit that they don’t have all the answers, they create space for others to step forward and offer solutions.
  • Role model being a “follower.” Inclusive leaders empower others to lead. 

Secret sauce of humble leaders

“Rather than calling attention to one’s self, humble leaders readily acknowledge the contributions and greatness of others. Instead of constantly showing how right they are, humble leaders look at their weaknesses and work on their areas for personal improvement.” Bold Business

Humble leaders understand that they are not the smartest person in every room and know how to get the most from their people and teams. “They encourage people to speak up, respect differences of opinion and champion the best ideas, regardless of whether they originate from a top executive or a production-line employee.”

When a leader works to harness input from everyone, other executives and line managers emulate the leader’s approach, and develop an internal culture of getting the best from every team and every individual takes root.

Additionally, when things go wrong, humble leaders admit to their mistakes and take responsibility. When things go right, they recognize their people and shine the spotlight on others.

Media and society tends to trumpet and “to be impressed by charismatic candidates with powerful personalities and a commanding presence”, according to Hyman.  Instead, Hyman’s advises managers during the hiring process to “search for quiet confidence, humility and a focus on others”.

In short, when leaders are humble, show respect, and ask how they can serve employees and team members to perform better, the outcomes can be outstanding and provide a much better recipe for success.

References:

  1. https://hbr.org/2014/05/the-best-leaders-are-humble-leaders
  2. https://www.catalyst.org/research/inclusive-leadership-the-view-from-six-countries/
  3. https://hbr.org/2018/04/how-humble-leadership-really-works
  4. https://www.forbes.com/sites/jeffhyman/2018/10/31/humility/?sh=33d404041c80
  5. https://www.boldbusiness.com/human-achievement/humility-leadership-combination

The Laws of Wealth by Daniel Crosby

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“Get rid of the excuses and get invested.” Fidelity Investment

Daniel Crosby, author of The Laws of Wealth, presents 10 rules of behavioral self-management.

Rule #1 – You Control What Matters Most. “The behavior gap measures the loss that the average investor incurs as a result of emotional responses to market conditions.” As an example, the author notes that the best performing mutual fund during the period 2000-2010 was CGM Focus, with an 18.2% annualized return; however the average investor in the fund had a negative return! The reason is that they tended to buy when the fund was soaring and sell in a panic when the price dipped. More on volatility later…

Rule #2 — You Cannot Do This Alone. “Vanguard estimated that the value added by working with a competent financial advisor is roughly 3% per year… The benefits of working with an advisor will be ‘lumpy’ and most concentrated during times of profound fear and greed… The best use of a financial advisor is as a behavioral coach rather than an asset manager.” Make sure your advisor is a fiduciary. “A fiduciary has a legal requirement to place his clients’ interest ahead of his own.”

Rule #3 – Trouble Is Opportunity. “The market feels most scary when it is actually most safe… Corrections and bear markets are a common part of any investment lifetime, they represent long-term buying opportunity and a systematic process is required to take advantage of them.” The author quotes Ben Carlson: “Markets don’t usually perform the best when they go from good to great. They actually show the best performance when things go from terrible to not-quite-so-terrible as before.”

To do this is by keeping some assets in cash a buy list of stocks that are great qualitly, have a strong balance sheet and a strong brand, but are expensive.

Rule #4 – If You’re Excited, It’s a Bad Idea. “Emotions are the enemy of good investment decisions.”

Rule #5 – You Are Not Special. “A belief in personal exceptionality causes us to ignore potential danger, take excessively concentrated stock positions and stray from areas of personal competence… An admission of our own mediocrity is what is required for investment excellence… This tendency to own success and outsource failure [known as fundamental attribution error] leads us to view all investment successes as personal skill, thereby robbing us of opportunities for learning as well as any sense of history. When your stocks go up, you credit your personal genius. When your stocks go down, you fault externalities. Meanwhile, you learn nothing.”

Rule #6 – Your Life Is the Best Benchmark. “As a human race, we are generally more interested in being better than other people than we are in doing well ourselves.” However, “measuring performance against personal needs rather than an index has been shown to keep us invested during periods of market volatility, enhance savings behavior and help us maintain a long-term focus.”

Rule #7 – Forecasting Is For Weathermen. “The research is unequivocal—forecasts don’t work. As a corollary, neither does investing based on these forecasts…. Scrupulously avoid conjecture about the future, rely on systems rather than biased human judgment and be diversified enough to show appropriate humility.”

Rule #8 – Excess Is Never Permanent. “We expect that if a business is well-run and profitable today this excellence will persist.” The author quotes James O’Shaughnessy: “‘The most ironclad rule I have been able to find studying masses of data on the stock market, both in the United States and developed foreign markets, is the idea of reversion to the mean.’ Contrary to the popular idea of bear markets being risky and bull markets being risk-free, the behavioral investor must concede that risk is actually created in periods of market euphoria and actualized in down markets.”

Rule #9 – Diversification Means Always Having to Say You’re Sorry. “You can take it to the bank that some of your assets will underperform every single year… The simple fact is that no one knows which asset classes will do well at any given time and diversification is the only logical response to such uncertainty… Broad diversification and rebalancing have been shown to add half a percentage point of performance per year, a number that can seem small until you realize how it is compounded over an investment lifetime.”

Rule #10 – Risk Is Not a Squiggly Line. “Wall Street is stuck in a faulty, short-sighted paradigm that views risk as a mathematical reduction [of volatility]… a flaw that can be profitably exploited by the long-term, behavioral investor who understands the real definition of risk… Volatility is the norm, not the exception, and it should be planned for and diversified against, but never run from… Let me say emphatically, there is no greater risk than overpaying for a stock, regardless of its larger desirability as a brand.”

One of the most interesting concepts in the book is that investing in an index is not as passive as we might assume. Crosby quotes Rob Arnott: “‘The process is subjective—not entirely rules based and certainly not formulaic. There are many who argue that the S&P 500 isn’t an index at all: It’s an actively managed portfolio selected by a committee—whose very membership is a closely guarded secret!—and has shown a stark growth bias throughout its recent history of additions and deletions… The capitalization-weighted portfolio overweights the overvalued stocks and underweights the undervalued stocks…’ In a very real sense, index investing locks in the exact opposite of what we ought to be doing and causes us to buy high and sell low… Buying a capitalization weighted index like the S&P 500 means that you would have held nearly 50% tech stocks in 2000 and nearly 40% financials in 2008.”

“Once we realize that passive indexes are not mined from the Earth, but rather assembled arbitrarily by committee, the most pertinent question is not if you are actively investing (you are) but how best to actively invest.”

“Behavioral risk is the potential for your actions to increase the probability of permanent loss of capital… Behavioral risk is a failure of self… Our own behavior poses at least as great a threat as business or market risks… We must design a process that is resistant to emotion, ego, bad information, misplaced attention and our natural tendency to be loss averse.”

Crosby presents rule-based behavioral investment, or RBI for short. “The myriad behavior traps to which we can fall prey can largely be mitigated through the simple but elegant process that is RBI. The process is easily remembered by the following four Cs:

  1. Consistency – frees us from the pull of ego, emotion and loss aversion, while focusing our efforts on uniform execution.
  2. Clarity – we prioritize evidence-based factors and are not pulled down the seductive path of worrying about the frightening but unlikely or the exciting but useless.
  3. Courageousness – we automate the process of contrarianism: doing what the brain knows best but the heart and stomach have trouble accomplishing.
  4. Conviction – helps us walk the line between hubris and fear by creating portfolios that are diverse enough to be humble and focused enough to offer a shot at long-term outperformance.”

“Rule-based investing is about making simple, systematic tweaks to your investment portfolio to try and get an extra percentage point or two that has a dramatic positive impact on managing risk and compounding your wealth over time… We know that what works are strategies that are diversified, low fee, low turnover and account for behavioral biases.”

“Just like a casino, you will stick to your discipline in all weather, realizing that if you tilt probability in your favor ever so slightly, you will be greatly rewarded in the end… Becoming a successful behavioral investor looks a great deal like being The House instead of The Drunken Vacationer.”

The author quotes Jason Zweig: “You will do a great disservice to yourselves… if you view behavioral finance mainly as a window onto the world. In truth, it is also a mirror that you must hold up to yourselves.”

Crosby, Daniel. The Laws of Wealth: Psychology and the Secret to Investing Success. Hampshire, Great Britain: Harriman House, 2016.

Health, Financial and Emotional Well-Being

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“We don’t see the world as it is, we see it as we are.” Anaïs Nin

Recent survey shows Americans are the unhappiest they have been in 50 years. Pandemic and health concerns, social unrest and economic distress have left Americans feeling tired, and living with a constant state of “brain fog” which are just a few symptoms of stress, anxiety, lack of sleep, and poor overall mental health.

People will exercise to help their bodies become fit, but when it comes to mental health, most people do nothing. Let’s be frank, the coronavirus has changed many Americans emotional, financial, and physical health circumstances dramatically and quickly. It’s important to take a holistic approach to your health, financial and emotional well-being. We know that planning for your future is about so much more than your finances – you and your family’s physical and emotional wellness are also a priority.

Time and time again, research has shown that “money cannot buy happiness” and that not only do you need a finite amount of money to be happy, but that prioritizing things like expressing gratitude, friendships, hobbies and family may actually lead to long-term well-being.

Keep physical, emotional and financial health a priority and in the center of your thoughts and daily life.

Overall emotional, physical and financial well-being are what your attempting to holistically achieve. It helps you feel more secure and less stressed in all areas. Sometimes the best thing you can do for your health – and your long-term financial security – is to tune it out the constant negative news. Here are some ways to tune out negativity during uncertain times.

  1. Put down the smart phone and turn off the news. Allow yourself just one hour of news time each day, preferably in the middle of the day. This ensures you don’t start or end your day anxious. It’s important to stay informed, but once a day should suffice.
  2. Stay positive and focus on an attitude of gratitude. List the top five (or more) things you’re grateful for each day. Your list may be the same from day to day or it could change based on the past day’s experience. It could be as simple as being thankful for the roof over your head or a smile from a stranger as you walk your neighborhood.
  3. Get physical and eat healthy. You’ve probably heard it before, and that’s because it’s true – physical activity is just as healthy for your mind as it is for your body. This doesn’t mean you have to participate in high intensity interval training. Start small. Simply going for a walk or doing basic stretches can help keep your mind and body at their best. Additionally, eliminate process foods, refined sugars and saturated fats from your diet. Eat more plant based foods and whole grains.
  4. Connect with family and friends. Having a strong support system is important during good times, but even more so during challenging ones. Reach out to someone you haven’t talked to in a while to see how they’re doing. Send a text or card or give them a call. If your family is spread out across the country, use digital apps to connect and play games.
  5. Stick to a schedule. When you’re stressed, it often takes a toll on your sleep schedule. Keeping a consistent routine can help. Get up and go to bed at the same times each day, even on weekends. Know your stress triggers and pay attention when you notice them flaring up.

While it’s important to be aware of what’s going on in the world, focusing on the bad news won’t help your financial strategy, your emotional well-being or your physical health. Remember, you’re in it for the long term.

During the current coronavirus pandemic, instead of ‘social distancing,’ our focus should be on ‘physical distancing’ and ‘social connection.'”

Maintain mental health and emotional well-being

Focus on the now. Worrying about the past or the future isn’t productive. When you start chastising yourself for past mistakes, or seeing disaster around every corner, you’re only creating more stress and anxiety in your life.

It’s important to stop and to take a breath and ask yourself what you can do right now to succeed. Find something to distract you from destructive thoughts and reset your attitude.

Achieving a healthy frame of mind can seem more challenging than in years past.

Having a daily moment of intentional quiet can go a long way toward a better outlook.

Try this five-minute meditation routine that combines both yoga and balance to steady the mind, utilize the breath to become more mindful, and reduce stress.

Mindfulness meditation does, in fact, decreases anxiety and improves self-esteem, studies have shown.

As you move through Mindfulness meditation, focus on deep breathing. Inhale and exhale through the nose, and start by filling up your lungs with air. Then feel the air rise up into the chest. As you exhale, empty the chest first and then feel the stomach deflate like a balloon. This slow, conscious and specific breath pattern aids in focusing the mind to the present moment.

Finally, if your mind wanders easily during this sequence, you can focus on a one-word mantra to recite silently to yourself. Choosing a word like “serenity” or “peace” or “confidence” and syncing your movement with your breath can help transport you to a different world that quiets distractions from the past and future.

References:

  1. https://www.synchronybank.com/blog/millie/money-and-happiness/https://www.synchronybank.com/blog/millie/money-and-happiness/
  2. https://apple.news/Am_LnLhs1Q22oltXhOLcRLg
  1. https://www.edwardjones.com/market-news-guidance/client-perspective/your-health-your-finances.html
  2. https://www.edwardjones.com/market-news-guidance/guidance/tune-out-stressful-times.html

Value Time Over Money

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“It’s essential that you place a high value on your time.”

Happiness is more than simply a positive mood, according to Psychology Today. It is a state of well-being that encompasses living a good life, one with a sense of meaning, purpose and deep contentment. Happiness encompasses feelings of satisfaction and c. involves creating strong relationships and helping others. It requires also uncomfortable or painful experiences—to continue to learn, grow, and evolve.

Coincidentally, emotional well-being refers to the emotional quality of an individual’s everyday experience—the frequency and intensity of experiences of joy, stress, sadness, anger, and affection that make one’s life pleasant or unpleasant.

Time and time again, research has shown that not only do you need a finite amount of money to be happy, but that prioritizing things like time, relationships, hobbies and family may actually lead to long-term well-being. Research shows that the finite sweet spot for yearly income is between $60,000 and $95,000 a year, not a high six-figure salary. Earnings above $95,000 do not necessarily equate to increased well-being.

A study published by Science Advances in 2019 found that recent grads who valued time over money, in which they took jobs that were less demanding but also paid less money, were generally happier.

People who prioritize money are generally driven by extrinsic motivations like shopping, which bring little personal satisfaction, researchers concluded.

On the other hand, people who prioritize time are typically intrinsically motivated, focusing on hobbies, relationships and cultivating gratitude instead. Intrinsic motivations build autonomy and purpose, which lead to long-term happiness, the researchers concluded.

Although wealth offers the potential for people to spend their time in happier ways, such as by living in a more expensive apartment closer to the office, survey data suggest that wealthier individuals often spend more of their time engaging in activities that are less enjoyable, such as commuting. Research suggests that rising incomes are linked to an increased sense of time scarcity.

Takeaway

Happy people live with purpose and value time over money. They find joy in lasting relationships, working toward their goals, and living according to their values. They tend not to garner happiness from material goods or luxury vacations. They’re fine with the simple pleasures of life and cultivating gratitude.

People who cultivate gratitude tend to better appreciate and enjoy life, as gratitude creates satisfaction that is intrinsic. To practice gratitude, reflect on what you’re grateful for each morning to shape the rest of the day, keep a gratitude journal, and reframe negative experiences by finding something within them for which you’re grateful, and can learn and grow.

References:

  1. https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/basics/happiness
  2. https://www.pnas.org/content/107/38/16489.full
  3. https://www.synchronybank.com/blog/millie/money-and-happiness/
  4. https://advances.sciencemag.org/content/5/9/eaax2615.full
  5. https://www.inc.com/jessica-stillman/5-things-science-learned-about-happiness-last-year.html
  6. https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/basics/happiness/how-find-happiness

Money and Happiness

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“The great Western disease is, ‘I’ll be happy when… When I get the money. When I get a BMW. When I get this job. When I get the relationship,’ Well, the reality is, you never get to when. The only way to find happiness is to understand that happiness is not out there. It’s in here. And happiness is not next week. It’s now.” Marshall Goldsmith

Research shows that after you make enough money to pay your essential expenses and save for the future, making more does little for your happiness. A 2010 study by economist and psychologist Daniel Kahneman found that, where wealth is concerned, a person’s satisfaction with their life no longer increases after about $75,000 ($90,000 in today’s dollars) a year.

If anything, once people start making a lot of money, they begin to think they’re doing worse in life, because they become obsessed with comparing themselves to those who appear richer and appear to be living a relatively larger and more luxurious social media embellished lifestyle. But, it important to remember that, “Money has never made man happy, nor will it, there is nothing in its nature to produce happiness”, Benjamin Franklin quipped. “The more of it one has the more one wants.

Instead, research suggests that spending money on experiences rather than tangible goods, giving to others with no thought of reward, and expressing gratitude for what you have, results in the greatest feelings of happiness.

Pitfalls of chasing money

Focusing on chasing the accoutrements of wealth is a trap, because it leads only to an increased focus on chasing wealth. Even multimillionaires make the mistake of believing that money, and not time, experiences and gratitude, will enrich their lives.

“These days, in our materialistic culture, many people are led to believe that money is the ultimate source of happiness. Consequently, when they don’t have enough of it they feel let down. Therefore, it is important to let people know that they have the source of contentment and happiness within themselves, and that it is related to nurturing our natural inner values.” Dalai Lama

A few thousand of the world’s wealthiest people were surveyed and asked how much money they’d needed to be “perfectly happy”, according to Harvard Business Review. Seventy-five percent (many of whom had a net worth of $10 million or more) said they’d needed “a lot more” ($5 million to $10 million, “at the very least”) to be happy.

It doesn’t take a PhD in psychology to see how misguided the mindset of “needing a lot more money” is not related to achieving happiness.

Money may not buy happiness, but there are some things you can do to try to increase happiness such as writing down what you’re grateful for. Literally “counting your blessings” can help you feel more positive. Instead of thinking about what you don’t have, think about the things you do have.

Nothing less than your health and happiness depends on reversing the innate notion that money alone leads to happiness. It’s important to start seeing time, daily habits, being grateful, and lifestyle are the main drivers that determines your happiness:

  1. Convince yourself that your time, expressing your gratitude, and your health are more important than money and your bank account balance.
  2. Remind yourself that your values and that your closely aligned goals when faced with critical life and financial decisions.
  3. Make deliberate and strategic decisions that allow you to have more time across days, weeks months, and years.

Among millionaires, past studies reveal that wealth may be likely to pay off in greater personal happiness only at very high levels of wealth ($10 million or more), and when that wealth was earned rather than inherited.

Takeaways

Research concludes that money can buy life satisfaction and that money is unlikely to buy happiness, but it may help you achieve happiness to an extent through experiences, expressing gratitude, and giving to others. Look for experiences and opportunities that will help you feel fulfilled and that are aligned with your values. And, remember to count your blessings.

And beyond that, you can find happiness through other nonfinancial means, like spending time with people you enjoy or thinking about the good things in your life. Since, “Happiness comes from spiritual wealth, not material wealth…”, according to Sir John Templeton. “Happiness comes from giving, not getting. If we try hard to bring happiness to others, we cannot stop it from coming to us also. To get joy, we must give it, and to keep joy, we must scatter it.”

References:

  1. https://www.pnas.org/content/107/38/16489.full
  2. https://www.cnbc.com/amp/2020/10/19/even-millionaires-make-this-money-mindset-mistake-says-harvard-psychologistheres-the-real-cost-of-it.html
  3. https://www.healthline.com/health/can-money-buy-happiness

Financial Mindset

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“It’s difficult to master the psychology and emotions behind earning, spending, debt, saving, investing, and building wealth.”

Personal finance is simple. Fundamentally, you only need to know one thing: To build wealth and achieve financial freedom, you must spend less than you earn. Yet, it seems challenging for most people to get ahead financially.

Financial success is more about mindset and behavior than it is about math, according to J.D. Roth, author of Get Rich Slowly. Financial success isn’t determined by how smart you are with numbers, but how well you’re able to control your emotions and behaviors regarding savings and spending.

Financial Mindset

“Change your mindset and attitude, and you can change your life.”

You sometimes have to make sacrifices in order to improve your financial situation. For instance, if you are in debt, you need to sacrifice some expenses so you can pay more towards managing and eliminating your debt. It is these financial sacrifices that will require you to have the right financial mindsets so you can overcome the obstacles that derail people from managing and eliminating their debt.

According to an article published in USAToday.com, Americans do not have a financial literacy problem. Instead, Americans simply make the wrong financial decisions and have bad final habits which does not necessarily translate that they are unaware of the best practices of financial management. We know how to make the right choices about our personal finances. The problem, according to the article’s author Peter Dunn, is that Americans have a financial behavioral problem. It is bad financial behavior, decisions and habits that usually get them into money trouble. It is what put them in a financially untenable position.

A perfect example is that you should never spend more than what you are earning. It is logical after all. But does that mean you follow it. Some people still end up in debt because they spend more than what they are earning.

Other examples of beliefs about money and personal finance include:

  • Taking personal responsibility regarding your finances is everything.
  • You shouldn’t buy things you can’t afford.
  • You don’t have to make a ton of money to be financially successful.
  • You can give yourself and your family an amazing life, if you’re able to remain disciplined and think long term.
  • Borrowing money from or lending money to your family isn’t recommended.
  • Education can get you a better job, if you get the right education.
  • You should buy life insurance.
  • You have much more to do with being a financial success than you think.

Financial literacy gems such as “spend less than you make,” “you need to budget” and “save for the future” are impotent attempts to help. However, lacking the correct financial mindset can make following the simple financial gems quite challenging.

There are 5 destructive financial mindsets that are the norm in our society today but you should actually get rid of starting today, according to NationalDebtRelief.com.

1. Using debt to reach your dreams.

This can actually be quite confusing. A lot of people say that it is okay to be in debt as long as it will help you reach your dreams. There is some truth to that but you should probably put everything into the right perspective. Buying your own home and getting a higher education are some of the supposedly “good debts.” It is okay to borrow for these if you can reach your dreams because of that debt. Not so fast. It may be logical to use debt to reach these but here’s the key to really make it work – you should not abuse it. If you get a home loan, buy a house that will help pay for itself. That way, the debt will not be a burden for you. When it comes to student loans, make sure that you work while studying to help pay for your loans while in school. Do what you can to keep debt from being a burden so it will not hinder you from reaching your dreams.

2. Thinking you do not need an emergency fund.

The phrase, “you only live once (YOLO)”, should no longer be your mindset – especially when it comes to your finances. You always have to think about the immediate future. If you really want to enjoy this life, you need to be smart about it. Do not splurge everything on present things that you think will make you happy. It is okay to postpone your enjoyment so you can build up your emergency fund. You are not as invincible as you think even if you are still young.

3. Settling for a stressful job to pay off debt.

“The most important thing when paying off your debts is to pay off your debts.”

Among the financial mindsets that you need to erase is forcing yourself to stay in a stressful job just so you can pay off your debt. You are justifying the miserable experience that you are going through in your job because you need it to meet your financial obligations. This is the wrong mindset. You need to put yourself in a financial position where you will never be forced to stay in a job that you do not like. Live a more frugal life that does not require you to spend a lot so you can pursue a low paying job and still afford to pay your debts.

4. Delaying your retirement savings.

Some young adults think that their retirement savings can wait. Some of them think that they need to pay off their debts first before they can start thinking about the future. This is not the right mindset if you want to improve your finances. You have to save for retirement even when you are drowning in debt.

5. Failing to have a backup plan.

The last of the financial mindsets that you need to forget is not having a backup plan. Do not leave things to chance if it involves your finances. You have to make a plan and not just that, you need to have a backup plan. If you have an emergency savings fund, do not rely on that alone. What if one emergency happens after another? Where will you get the funds to pay for everything? Think about that before you act.

Takeaway

Remember, personal finance is simple…it’s your emotion, behavior and habits that are challenging. Bottom-line, it comes down to your financial mindset.  Smart money management is more about your mindset than it is about personal financial math of net worth, cash flow, saving and investing. The math of personal finance is simple and easy. It’s the psychology that’s tough and challenging. Essentially, the concepts to improving your finances and achieving financial freedom are simple but it is not easy to follow through with them.

References:

  1. https://business.time.com/2013/03/11/why-financial-literacy-fails/
  2. https://www.usatoday.com/story/money/personalfinance/2015/09/27/americans-financial-literacy-behavior/72260844/
  3. https://business.time.com/2011/09/22/debt-tsunamis-debt-snowballs-and-why-the-conventional-wisdom-about-defeating-debt-is-wrong/
  4. https://www.nationaldebtrelief.com/5-financial-mindsets-you-need-to-get-rid-of/
  5. https://www.getrichslowly.org
  6. https://obliviousinvestor.com
  7. https://petetheplanner.com/yes-you-are-an-investor-think-like-one/