Category Archives: Gratitude

Two Wolves

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An old Cherokee is teaching his grandson about life. “A fight is going on inside me,” he said to the boy.

“It is a terrible fight and it is between two wolves.

  • One is evil – he is anger, envy, sorrow, regret, greed, arrogance, self-pity, guilt, resentment, inferiority, lies, false pride, superiority, and ego.” He continued,
  • “The other is good – he is joy, peace, love, hope, serenity, humility, kindness, benevolence, empathy, generosity, truth, compassion, and faith.

The same fight is going on inside you – and inside every other person, too.”

The grandson thought about it for a minute and then asked his grandfather, “Which wolf will win?”

The old Cherokee simply replied, “The one you feed.”

Feeding yourself with or focusing on negative thoughts can bring out the worst in yourself.

Conversely, positive thinking fuels the goodness within us. We exude joy, peace, hope, kindness, and love.

Essentially, what you focus your mind and thoughts on grows.

References:

  1. https://www.virtuesforlife.com/two-wolves/

Thought of the Day

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There are no limitations to the mind conditioned for success and achievement.

“Try as hard as you wish and you cannot be happy unless you BELIEVE IN YOURSELF!

Work with all the strength at your command and you cannot accumulate more than barely enough to live on unless you BELIEVE IN YOURSELF!

The one and only person in all this world through whose efforts you can be supremely happy under all circumstances, and, through whose labor you can accumulate all the material wealth that you can use legitimately, is YOURSELF!” —Napoleon Hill

When you believe in your ability to succeed…you completely transform your life.

Mary McLeod Bethune: The First Lady of the Struggle

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“Believe in yourself, learn, and never stop wanting to build a better world.” ~ Dr. Mary McLeod Bethune.

Dr. Mary McLeod Bethune was an educator, philanthropist, humanitarian, and civil rights activist who founded the National Council of Negro Women and served in several capacities during the Franklin D. Roosevelt administration, including head of the Division of Negro Affairs of the National Youth Administration and advisor on selecting officer candidates for the Women’s Army Corps.

Tireless, talented and committed to service, Dr. Bethune founded Bethune Cookman College and served has its president. While leading the school, Dr. Bethune also held leadership positions in several prominent organizations.

Because of her dedication to improving the conditions of African Americans, she was called “The First Lady of the Struggle.”

A statue of the Dr. Mary McLeod Bethune was unveiled in the National Statuary Hall at the U.S. Capitol, making Bethune the first Black American to have a state statue in the hall’s collection.

“I plunged into the job of creating something from nothing…. Though I hadn’t a penny left, I considered cash money as the smallest part of my resources. I had faith in a living God, faith in myself, and a desire to serve.” ~ Dr. Mary McLeod Bethune

References:

  1. https://www.internetpillar.com/mary-mcleod-bethune-quotes/
  2. https://www.blackenterprise.com/black-educator-mary-mcleod-bethune-honored-with-state-statue-at-u-s-capitol/

The Power of Faith

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“Faith consists in believing when it is beyond the power of reason to believe.” ~ Voltaire

What is the Power of Faith?

One example of the “power of faith” is to imagine that you’re a passenger on a Boeing 747 jetliner and trusting that the law of physics applies regarding the lifting force generated by aircraft wings are sufficient to allow an inanimate cylindrical object that has a mass of several thousand kilograms to sustain controlled flight at an altitude of over thirty thousand feet for several hours and several thousand miles.

Faith is believing and trusting that aeronautical engineers properly designed the passenger jetliner, that manufactures, such as Boeing or Airbus, correctly assembled the technological complex flying machine, and that government agencies, like the FAA, reliably certified the jetliner as safe you’re currently flying on as a passenger.

Finally, faith is accepting that the pilots at the controls are adequately trained and experienced to fly the multi-engine passenger jet, that the maintenance technicians were competent and skilled in their duties to maintain the aircraft systems and prevent catastrophic failure while the aircraft is in flight, and that the operations watch standers are cognizant and alert to ensure no other aircraft will share the same volume of airspace at the same time with the jetliner in which you’re a passenger.

Bottomline, most things we do in life, such as flying the friendly skies, are based solely on conscious or subconscious faith.

Faith is believing, trusting and accepting the unknown or that which you cannot know for certain. In a way, faith is believing and trusting what you cannot be entirely be certain about.

It’s the complete and absolute trust or confidence in someone or something. Educator Dr. Mary McLeod Bethune was quoted as saying, “I plunged into the job of creating something from nothing…. Though I hadn’t a penny left, I considered cash money as the smallest part of my resources. I had faith in a living God, faith in myself, and a desire to serve.”

Believing and having faith in yourself will ensure you achieve your loftiest goals. You can say that faith is the key to living a better and more fulfilling life.

“Faith is the first factor in a life devoted to service. Without it, nothing is possible. With it, nothing is impossible.” ~ Mary McLeod Bethune

Gratitude

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“Integrate gratitude into your daily life.”

It’s essential to find gratitude every day.

Gratitude means thanks and appreciation for all things. It’s the state of feeling grateful — a conscious, positive emotion one can express when feeling especially thankful for something, whether intangible or tangible.

Robert Emmons, in a Greater Good essay, “Why Gratitude Is Good”, argues that gratitude has two key components:

  • “First, it’s an affirmation of goodness. We affirm that there are good things in the world, gifts and benefits we’ve received.”
  • Second, people should “recognize that the sources of this goodness are outside of ourselves. … We acknowledge that other people—or even higher powers, if you’re of a spiritual mindset—gave us many gifts, big and small, to help us achieve the goodness in our lives.”

“Gratitude is “an affirmation of goodness and a recognition that this goodness is sourced outside the self.” This doesn’t mean that life is perfect and peaceful, but when you look at life as a whole, gratitude encourages you to identify some amount of goodness and joy in your life.” Dr. Robert Emmons

References:

  1. https://greatergood.berkeley.edu/topic/gratitude/definition
  2. https://www.brownleeglobal.com/gratitude-research/

Gratitude Research

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Gratitude is “an affirmation of goodness and a recognition that this goodness is sourced outside the self.” This doesn’t mean that life is perfect and peaceful, but when you look at life as a whole, gratitude encourages you to identify some amount of goodness and joy in your life. Dr. Robert Emmons

Research indicates that gratitude can lower blood pressure, improve immune function, reduce cardiac inflammation, increase happiness, improve relationships, and decrease depression. 

Dr. Robert Emmons, professor of psychology at the University of California, Davis, researcher, and author of the book Thanks! How the New Science of Gratitude Can Make You Happier, suggests that you “integrate gratitude into your daily life, rather than make it something you need to add to an already busy day”.

He recommends that you simply make it a point to notice opportunities that you can be thankful for and practice gratitude regularly.

Practicing gratitude can also make you better equipped to handle the difficulties of life that inevitably arise. In fact, according to Emmons, it’s an essential part of the process of healing from trauma. Even despair can be mitigated by the experience of appreciation for the good, however slight it might be.

Many survivors of the Holocaust, when asked to tell their stories, remember most strongly the feelings of gratitude for food, shelter, or clothing that was offered to them. This sense of thankfulness for the small blessings helped them maintain their humanity despite experiencing a horrific tragedy.

Additionally, many people with life-threatening illnesses also report decreased distress and increased positive emotions when they practice gratitude.

10 tips to fit gratitude in your life

Here are ten ways to become a more thankful person, according to Dr. Emmons:

  1. Every day, say aloud three good things that happened. It’s also extremely powerful to express gratitude aloud when you’re alone.
  2. Keep a gratitude journal. Jot down the small things from your day that mattered to you. If you’re having a particularly rough day, you can look back through the pages of accumulated blessings in your life.
  3. Say thanks to your partner. Couples who express gratitude toward one another set up a powerful feedback loop of intimacy and trust, where both partners feel as if their needs are being met.
  4. Cool a hot temper with a quick gratitude inventory. One of the quickest ways to dispel the energy of a stormy mood is to focus your attention on what’s good. So when you’re about to lash out at someone, take a moment to do a quick inventory of five things you’re thankful for in the moment. It will help you relax and avoid saying something you’ll later regret.
  5. Thank yourself. Gratitude doesn’t always need to be focused on what other people have done for you! Make sure you give yourself a thank-you for the healthy habits you’ve cultivated in your own life.
  6. Use technology to send three gratitude messages a week. Harness the power of this technology to send out some good vibes, such as a text or Facebook comment, to tell your friends why you appreciate them.
  7. Savor the good moments. If you notice you’re feeling happy, stop what you’re doing and pay attention for a few minutes. Notice exactly how you feel, including the sensations in your body and the thoughts you’re having. Later, when you’re trying to inspire gratitude, you can remember this moment and experience the benefits all over again.
  8. Check for silver linings. Even the most difficult life challenges come with some benefit—you just have to look to find them. Making a mistake teaches you a lesson. When things feel hard, ask yourself: What’s good here?
  9. Look outward, not inward. Robert Emmons says people are more likely to feel grateful when they put their focus on others, rather than getting caught up in their own inner narratives about how things should have gone. Empathy for others can trigger a sense of gratitude, and people who have an outward focus tend to experience stronger benefits.
  10. Change your perspective. If you struggle to come up with something to feel grateful for, put yourself in the shoes of someone who is experiencing misfortunes greater than your own. It will inspire gratitude for your own healthy body and circumstances, which you may have taken for granted otherwise.

It is vitally important to your health and overall emotional well being to cultivate a sense of gratitude in your life. Research confirms that gratitude effectively increases happiness and reduces depression.

References:

  1. https://www.takingcharge.csh.umn.edu/making-gratitude-part-everyday-life-tips-dr-robert-emmons
  2. https://www.takingcharge.csh.umn.edu/10-ways-be-more-thankful-person

Hope is a Way of Thinking…a Super Power

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Hope is a feeling of expectation, a desire or wish for a certain thing to happen.

According to psychologist and renowned hope researcher Charles R. Snyder et al. (1991) hope is a positive cognitive state based on a sense of successful goal-directed determination and planning to meet these goals.

“Hope is not an emotion; it’s a way of thinking or a cognitive process.” Brené Brown

In other words, hope is like a snap-shot of a person’s current goal-directed thinking, highlighting the motivated pursuit of goals and the expectation that those goals can be achieved.

Hope helps us remain committed to our goals and motivated to take action towards achieving. Hope gives people a reason to continue fighting and believing that their current circumstances will improve, despite the unpredictable nature of human existence.

As psychologist and renowned hope researcher Charles Snyder et al. (2002, p. 269) stated so eloquently:

A rainbow is a prism that sends shards of multicolored light in various directions. It lifts our spirits and makes us think of what is possible. Hope is the same – a personal rainbow of the mind.

While some approaches conceptualize hope in the realm of being, that is acknowledging hope during illness and within palliative care; Snyder et al (1991) emphasized the relevance of hope in the context of doing – that is the capacity to achieve goals.

According to Snyder’s Hope Theory (Snyder, Irving, & Anderson, 1991), hopefulness is a life-sustaining human strength comprised of three distinct but related components:

  1. Goals Thinking – the clear conceptualization of valuable goals.
  2. Pathways Thinking – the capacity to develop specific strategies to reach those goals.
  3. Agency Thinking – the ability to initiate and sustain the motivation for using those strategies.

Hope does not necessarily fade in the face of adversity; in fact hope often endures despite poverty, war and famine. While no one is exempt from experiencing challenging life events, hope fosters an orientation to life that allows a grounded and optimistic outlook even in the most challenging of circumstances.

Practicing optimism has much in common with hope. Both are concerned with a positive future orientation and both assume that good things will generally occur in one’s life.

The difference is that optimism is a positive attitude about a future event that is probable and likely to occur: the optimist expects that life will work out well and as expected (Scheier & Carver, 1993).

On the other hand, being hopeful is regarded as more realistic than optimistism.

The hopeful individual recognizes that life may not always work out as planned, yet maintains positive expectancy directed toward possible outcomes that hold personal significance (Miceli & Castelfranchi, 2002)

Hope is more than just a state of mind; it is an action-oriented strength.

References:

  1. https://positivepsychology.com/hope-therapy/

C.R. Snyder was a fellow of the APA in the divisions of teaching, social and personality, clinical, and health. He worked as the director of the Clinical Psychology Program at the University of Kansas and was  the editor of the Journal of Social and Clinical Psychology. Snyder passed away in 2006.

The biblical definition of hope is “confident expectation.” Hope means “a feeling of expectation and desire for a certain thing to happen” and it is a cognitive processes or way of thinking.

“Be joyful always; pray continually; give thanks in all circumstances, for this is God’s will for you in Christ Jesus.” ~ 1 Thessalonians 5:16–18 (NIV)

Your Powerful Thoughts and Mind

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“You will attract to you…the very things, or the very station in life, that you create in your thoughts.” —Napoleon Hill

The most powerful tool available to you is your mind and you can attract the very things you create in your thoughts and mind, writes Napoleon Hill, America’s most followed motivational author about the principles of success. “Your thoughts singularly determine your personal outcomes in life, as well as your ability to enjoy the journey,” he opines.

In order to harness your thoughts to create the life you desire, you simply need to utilize the mental resources already within your possession, Hill concluded. You must cultivate a thorough understanding of the workings of the mind and the manner in which thoughts may be transformed into their physical counterparts.
 
In order to create positive change in your life, you must learn to harness the power of your thoughts. In particular, you must discover how to:

  • Magnetize your thought impulses with desire
  • Refine your thoughts with definiteness of purpose
  • Control and direct your emotions to productive ends
  • Support your goals with a compelling network of motives
  • Create positive thought habits through concentration and repetition
  • Protect your mind from negative external influences

The more you practice, the greater control you will have over your thoughts and emotions, which will enable you to enjoy more success in the pursuit of your definite major purpose.

Essentially, Dr. Hill wrote that there are no limitations to the mind conditioned for success and achievement.

“Try as hard as you wish and you cannot be happy unless you BELIEVE IN YOURSELF!

Work with all the strength at your command and you cannot accumulate more than barely enough to live on unless you BELIEVE IN YOURSELF!

The one and only person in all this world through whose efforts you can be supremely happy under all circumstances, and, through whose labor you can accumulate all the material wealth that you can use legitimately, is YOURSELF!” —Napoleon Hill

By understanding and embracing the power of thought and your mind, you will be able to operate at a higher plane of thought and action, better recognizing opportunities, gaining influence, and instilling this critical quality in others.

According to Napoleon Hill (Law of Success), self-confidence is…

  • the banishment of fear
  • the acquisition of mental courage
  • a safeguard from failure and defeat
  • the foundation for high achievement
  • the secret to attracting opportunities
  • the impetus for taking action on your dreams
  • the crucial ingredient for healthy relationships
  • the key to personal freedom and joy

When you believe in your ability to succeed…you completely transform your life.

“Change your thoughts and you change your world.” ~ Norman Vincent Peale

Most people take their joys and blessings for granted. Instead of focusing on their joys and blessings, they rather focus on what they do not have; or, constantly think and complain about their problems and troubles.

But, changing your focus and thoughts from problems to joy, and from what you don’t have to expressing gratitude for your many life blessings will change your life. And, a great way to change your thoughts is to appreciate and enjoy what you already have.

“Gratitude unlocks the fullness of life. It turns what we have into enough, and more. It turns denial into acceptance, chaos to order, confusion to clarity. It can turn a meal into a feast, a house into a home, a stranger into a friend.” ~ Melody Beattie

Focus on changing your thoughts and focus instead of changing the world and environment around you

It is impossible to change the world or environment around you. The best and wisest course of action is to change yourself or at least change your thoughts and attitude towards the people or situations you do not like.

“Never underestimate your power to change yourself; never overestimate your power to change others.” ~ Wayne Dyer

References:

  1. https://www.amazon.com/Napoleon-Hills-Language-Thought-Publication/dp/164095242X/ref=nodl_
  2. https://www.brownleeglobal.com/working-on-your-goals-and-expressing-gratitude-everyday/
  3. https://www.amazon.com/dp/1640952349/ref=emc_b_5_mob_i
  4. https://www.purposefairy.com/66095/change-your-thoughts/