“Your view of yourself can determine everything.”
According to Stanford psychologist Dr. Carol Dweck’s essential finding — children who have a “growth mindset” that intelligence can be developed are better able to overcome academic stumbling blocks than those who have a “fixed mindset” that intelligence is predetermined — is as relevant as ever. Her work has influenced research across the social sciences and reached tens of thousands of schoolchildren nationwide. (Source: Why Mindset Matters, Stanford Magazine, September 20, 2017, by Marina Krakovsky)
https://medium.com/stanford-magazine/carol-dweck-mindset-research-eb80831095b5
Dr. Dweck states: “…in the growth mindset, failure can be a painful experience. But it doesn’t define you. It’s a problem to be faced, dealt with, and learned from.” We can still learn from our mistakes.
Dr. Carol Dweck’s Growth Mindset tips for parents:
- Listen to what you say to your kids, with an ear toward the messages you’re sending about mindset.
- Instead of praising children’s intelligence or talent, focus on the processes they used.
- Example: “That homework was so long and involved. I really admire the way you concentrated and finished it.”
- Example: “That picture has so many beautiful colors. Tell me about them.”
- Example: “You put so much thought into that essay. It really makes me think about Shakespeare in a new way.
- When your child messes up, give constructive criticism — feedback that helps the child understand how to fix the problem, rather than labeling or excusing the child.
- Pay attention to the goals you set for your children; having innate talent is not a goal, but expanding skills and knowledge is.
(Souce: Why Mindset Matters, Stanford Magazine, September 20, 2017, by Marina Krakovsky)
Dr. Dweck advises, “If parents want to give their children a gift, the best thing they can do is to teach their children to love challenges, be intrigued by mistakes, enjoy effort, and keep on learning. That way, their children will have a lifelong way to build and repair their own confidence.”. She advises also not to praise intelligence or talent, but praise the work ethic.
…[W]e can praise wisely, not praising intelligence or talent. That has failed. Don’t do that anymore. But praising the process that kids engage in: their effort, their strategies, their focus, their perseverance, their improvement. This process praise creates kids who are hardy and resilient.
How we word things affects confidence, the words ‘yet’ or ‘not yet,’ “give kids greater confidence, give them a path into the future that creates greater persistence.” We can change mindsets.