Tag Archives: Gratitude

Major Definite Purpose

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“A man without a definite major purpose is as helpless as a ship without a compass.” – Napoleon Hill

Napoleon Hill emphasized in his book “Think and Grow Rich” that the first step of learning how to “Think and Grow Rich” is figuring out what you desire more than anything else – and then coming up with a plan to act on it.

Hill puts a great importance on individuals deciding on a definite major purpose. Yet, it’s not unheard of for people to get stuck on this first step.

In fact, the #1 question that most ask is: “How do I determine what my definite major purpose is? I just don’t know what it is I want to do!”

It is said widely that ninety-five percent of the people of the world drift through life aimlessly without definite purposes for their lives.

Psychological reason for having a definite purpose in life implies that one’s actions are determined by the thoughts of one’s mind. Therefore, if you deliberately hold your definite purpose in your mind with the expectation of it realization, this will permeate your subconscious mind to the point where it will automatically influence the actions needed to achieve your definite purpose.

Once you determine your definite purpose, make sure that it is well-defined. You must write it down and place it where you can see it as soon as you open your eyes in the morning and the last thing that you see before you close your eyes at night.

What is your Life’s Mission? What is the number one purpose in your life? Why are you here? What are the most important accomplishments you desire? And what are you willing to give in return for them? 

What one great thing would you dare to dream if you knew you could not fail, asks Brian Tracy?

“If you could be absolutely guaranteed of successfully achieving any goal, large or small, short term or long term, what one goal would it be?  Whatever you answer to this question, if you can write it down, you can probably achieve it.  From then on, the only question you should ask is, ‘How?’  The only real limit is how badly you want it and how long you are willing to work toward it.” Brian Tracy

Once you know your bigger purpose, it’s easier to figure out your next actions.  And, when you know your bigger purpose, it can help you funnel your time, talent, energy, and effort into something that really matters to you.

Definite Purpose:

If you cannot see the end of the journey, you cannot plot the course to that destination.

Thus, it’s essential to determine “The one goal that is most important to you at the moment. It is usually the one goal that will help you to achieve more of your other goals than anything else you can accomplish,” Tracy writes. In his, “6 Attributes of Your Major Definite Purpose,” Tracy writes:

  1. Your major definite purpose must be something that you personally really want, excites you and makes you happy.
  2. Your major definite purpose must be clear and specific.  You must be able to define it in words and must be able to write it down.
  3. Your major definite purpose must be measurable and quantifiable.
  4. Your major definite purpose must be both believable and achievable.
  5. Your major definite purpose should have a reasonable probability of success.
  6. Your major definite purpose must be in harmony with your other goals and aligned with your values.

“Decide now what you desire from life and what you have to give in return.”

To achieve success, you have know exactly what you want and what you are willing to give-up in return….success and achievement are a two-way street.

References:

  1. https://sourcesofinsight.com/major-definite-purpose/
  2. https://www.mavericonsulting.com/news/2018/12/14/what-is-definiteness-of-purpose-and-why-is-it-so-importantnbsp
  3. https://thinkandgrowrichinstitute.com/definite-major-purpose/

Since 1937, over 120 million copies of Think & Grow Rich have been sold, and it’s the #1 book most people who have successfully built wealth credit with their success.

The Present and In All Things Be Grateful

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“A happy man is too satisfied with the present to dwell too much on the future.” –Albert Einstein

The present is also the only place where happiness and peace can be experienced. Sadly though, the past and future are where many people choose to live their lives.

Equally important is that whatever happens in the now, there is always a choice in how to respond.

How you decide respond to what happens to you will be the ultimate deciding factor as to the quality of success, peace and happiness you will have in life.

Be Grateful For What You Have Now

Part of living in the present moment is taking the time to be grateful for what you have now (not in the past or in the future). If you are constantly focused on things you don’t have, you aren’t taking the time to appreciate what you have right now at this moment.

One way to practice gratitude is to write a list of things you are grateful for and review that list on a daily basis. Try to write at least three things you are grateful for in your life right now.

Alternatively, you can write out as many things as you can think that you’re grateful for.

In short, in all things be grateful.

References:

  1. https://www.success.com/if-you-want-to-be-happy-tell-the-big-mouth-inside-your-head-to-shut-up/
  2. https://www.verywellmind.com/how-do-you-live-in-the-present-5204439

Gratitude and Building Wealth

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“Be thankful for what you have; you’ll end up having more. If you concentrate on what you don’t have, you will never, ever have enough.” – Oprah Winfrey

Gratitude is the secret to building wealth! Why? Because gratitude turns what you have into enough. This is what makes gratitude a foundational element to wealth building. Gratitude allows you to find joy in what you already have. Keeping up with the Jones is the silent stealer of wealth.  Comparison is the thief of joy.  

Gratitude, the practice of appreciating all that the stuff you currently own, is an essential factor in building wealth over the long term. For example,

Gratitude allows you to appreciate and focus on the assets you already own.

“Gratitude in advance is the most powerful creative force in the universe. Most people do not know this, yet it is true. Expressing thankfulness in advance is the way of all Masters. So do not wait for a thing to happen and then give thanks. Give thanks before it happens, and watch energies swirl! To thank God before something occurs is an act of extraordinary faith. And that, of course, is where the power comes from.” — Neale Donald Walsch

The way to your best life is owning every moment and staking a claim to the here and now, according to Oprah Winfrey. “I live in the space of thankfulness — and for that, I have been rewarded a million times over. I started out giving thanks for small things, and the more thankful I became, the more my bounty increased. That’s because — for sure — what you focus on expands. When you focus on the goodness in life, you create more of it.”

Oprah says when she started keeping a gratitude journal more than 2 decades ago, it was one of the most important things she’s done. The daily practice of writing down five things to be grateful for balanced her life in subtle and inspiring ways. “It sounds simple,” Oprah says, “but when you go through the day staying conscious about what you put on your gratitude list, it shifts the lens through which you see the world.”

The practice of gratitude begins with being grateful for all the things you currently have – family, friends, experiences, and assets. Gratitude is focusing on all that you have and being thankful.

Wealth is much more than material things and owning assets. It is the presence of having a life filled with happiness in being, doing, and having what you want in life.

All too often, you fail to recognize your accomplishment because you are too busy moving onto the next task on your agenda. Yet, much of your success has to do with the people around you who have helped you focus on what’s important and helped you reach your goals.

Always remember, success, like wealth building, is a journey.

Building Wealth Takes Time

Some people are reluctant to make a wealth-building plan because they don’t want to wait 10 years. They would rather enjoy their money now.

The folly with this type of thinking is that most of us are going to be alive in 10 years. The question is whether or not you will be better off 10 years from now than you are today. Where you are right now is the sum total of the decisions you have made in the past. Practicing gratitude now can line you up for success and wealth building in the future.

Measure and focus on what you want more of. What you focus on expands.

You may think of money and wealth when you hear of measuring what you want more of, however; the same holds true for expressing gratitude. Make a list of things you are grateful for or write out what you are grateful for in a journal.

Complaining, blaming, or venting puts your focus on the negative things in life. You may wonder why some people seem more abundant than others.

To build wealth, it’s best to follow the two strategies that have the highest chances of success. And that is to practice gratitude, and to get into the habit of saving and investing early and to keep it up.

Gratitude is the key to building wealth

You might think building wealth is all about money, but it’s also very much about mindset. If you want to cultivate a money mindset that helps you build wealth, gratitude is a key component. Because gratitude can help shift your mindset from scarcity to abundance, help you spend less, and feel better. 

There is so much abundance in front of you if you choose to see it. The more you intentionally work to change your mindset, the easier it will become to see the abundance in life.

Actively practicing gratitude helps you realize how much you have to be grateful for right now instead of focusing on what’s missing. 

A scarcity mindset focuses on what’s missing and always wants more. It feels like there is never enough. This mindset can be harmful to your financial health because you can make poor decisions out of fear.

When you are in an abundance mindset, you realize your opportunities are limitless. You believe there’s never enough, instead you think there is always more than enough. Focusing on abundance can help you attract more money and have a healthier money mindset. 

Gratitude can help build that abundance muscle. Let’s say that you have a studio apartment but you dream of having your own 2-bedroom house. You don’t have the car you want now but imagine getting a Tesla. 

When you focus on gratitude, you focus on the fact that you have a roof over your head, that you’re healthy, and that your car still works instead of focusing on the fact that you don’t have a 2-bedroom house or Tesla yet. 

When you focus on gratitude and appreciate what you have now, you start to realize that you need even less than you thought. In today’s culture, we are conditioned to want more, to seek bigger and better, which of course affects our spending. 

Being content with what you have now can lead to less spending because you realize you have everything you need. That doesn’t mean that you can’t strive for more. It means that you can truly enjoy the journey rather than feel the emptiness of what’s missing. 

When you acknowledge and are grateful for whatever you have, it allows more to be drawn to you and changes the way you experience life. The more grateful you are, the more wealth that you have.

“Feeling grateful or appreciative of someone or something in your life actually attracts more of the things that you appreciate and value into your life.” — Christiane Northrup

References:

  1. https://debrakasowski.com/2014/02/22/what-does-gratitude-have-to-do-with-wealth-building/
  2. https://www.goalcast.com/7-oprah-winfrey-quotes-to-charge-your-day-with-gratitude/
  3. https://www.oprah.com/own-podcasts/oprah-winfrey-grace-and-gratitude
  4. https://www.newretirement.com/retirement/keys-to-building-wealth-after-50/
  5. https://www.thebalance.com/how-to-become-wealthy-356376
  6. https://grow.acorns.com/self-made-millionaire-money-habits/

In All Things Be Grateful

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God is good…All the time.

God is good in every situation and every circumstance, not just in those situations we view as good or favorable. He is with us even during challenging times and problems.

We don’t have to like everything that enters our lives, but we can be grateful for the fact Jesus is with us in whatever we are going through.

Thomas Edison once said that “I’ve never made a mistake. I’ve only learned from experience.”

“We haven’t failed. We now know a thousand things that won’t work, so we are much closer to finding what will.” ~ Thomas Edison

In all things be grateful

Expressing gratitude is an essential skill everyone needs to learn and practice to achieve success and to learn and grow.

Research shows that it impossible to be both fearful and grateful simultaneously. Moreover, it’s possible to worry and to be anxious, and be grateful.

You should be grateful for the multitude of blessings you experience in your life daily. You should as well be grateful for life’s problems and challenges; and view problems and challenges for what they are, opportunities to learn, grow and improve.

So always be grateful and always remember and embrace the adage, in life, there are either successes or learning opportunities.

References:

  1. https://inspireafire.com/can-we-be-grateful-in-all-things/
  2. https://www.internetpillar.com/thomas-edison-quotes/
  3. https://www.inc.com/kevin-daum/37-quotes-from-thomas-edison-that-will-bring-out-your-best.html

Know the Value of Stuff; Not Just the Price

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“Price is what you pay. Value is what you get.” Warren Buffett

A father said to his daughter “You have graduated with honors, here is a car I bought many years ago. It is a bit older now. But before I give it to you, take it to the used car lot downtown and tell them I want to sell it and see how much they offer you for it.

The daughter went to the used car lot, returned to her father and said, “They offered me $1,000 because the said it looks pretty worn out.”

The father said, now “Take it to the pawn shop.” The daughter went to the pawn shop, returned to her father and said,”The pawn shop offered only $100 because it is an old car.”

The father asked his daughter to go to a car club now and show them the car. The daughter then took the car to the club, returned and told her father,” Some people in the club offered $100,000 for it because it’s a Nissan Skyline R34, it’s an iconic car and sought by many collectors”

Now the father said this to his daughter, “The right place values you the right way,” If you are not valued, do not be angry, it means you are in the wrong place. Those who know your value are those who appreciate you……Never stay in a place where no one sees your value.”

Don’t force yourself to stay where you are not regarded….

Stay where you are appreciated.

Source: https://www.facebook.com/743724219/posts/10159846889864220/

Gratitude, Winning and Success – Cael Sanderson

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The foundation for success and winning is based on gratitude.

Cael Sanderson has dominated the wrestling world over the past two decades.

Cael, the collegiate wrestler, went a remarkable 159-0 at Iowa State from 1999-2002, winning four wrestling Division I NCAA National Championships, winning the NCAA Most Outstanding Wrestler award all four years, the only wrestler to ever achieve this distinction and three Dan Hodge trophies.

Cael is the only college wrestler in NCAA history to never lose a match over a four-year career — considered the No. 2 achievement in college sports history, according to Sports Illustrated. (Surpassed only by Jesse Owens’ four world records in 45 minutes as an Ohio State Buckeye track and field phenom.)

Cael, the Olympian won a Gold Medalist, (at 84 kg, during the 2004 Athens Olympiad).

And finally, there is Cael Sanderson, the Coach of the Penn State Nitty Lions Wrestling Team.

Cael arrived as head wrestling coach at Penn State in April 2009. Since then, Cael’s Nittany Lions have won an unprecedented 11 NCAA team national championships in 15 seasons (2011, 2012, 2013, 2014, 2016, 2017, 2018, 2019, 2021, 2023, 2024), the most recent this past spring, when six Penn State wrestlers made the championship finals and four walked away with championships.

Also, during the fifteen seasons, he coached Penn State program to:

  • 38 individual NCAA national titles through 2024.
  • Named Big Ten Coach of the Year 13 times and National Coach of the Year 9 times.
  • 132 All-American honors awarded.
  • In the 2023-24 season, his team went 16-0 in duals, won the Big Ten regular season and tournament titles, and claimed their 11th NCAA team title.
  • Dual meet record at Penn State through 2024 is 277-39-2.

His overriding philosophy is that everything in life and sports — peace of mind, happiness, getting the most out of what you have — springs off an ‘attitude of gratitude.’

Gratitude is right at the foundation of all things, especially his remarkable success and winning as a wrestler and head coach.

What does gratitude mean?

For Cael Sanderson, it means that “you think less about yourself. If I’m grateful, I’m going to think less about myself and more about others, and the opportunities I have.”

“You count your blessings and then you make your blessings count”, says Sanderson.

True gratitude isn’t just if you win. “True gratitude is based on all things — success and failure”, says Sanderson. “If you’re truly grateful, you’re going to maintain that sense of gratitude regardless of the outcome. Otherwise, it’s not gratitude.”

He opined that gratitude is a foreign idea initially to five-star college wrestlers. “Especially when you are a superstar athlete and everybody is kind of serving you and it’s about you. That’s instead of taking a step back and saying, ‘Wow, look how blessed I am.’”

“Getting the most out of yourself and the most out of the blessings that you have.”

When you can take a step back and look at life like that, it can change your perspective. It takes the pressure off. You’re just trying to get the most out of yourself and the most out of the blessings that you have.

Additionally, Sanderson explains that gratitude is remembering that, ‘I do want the pressure. I do want the opportunity to compete for a national championship. I’m grateful that I have this pressure right now because if there is pressure it means I am not quite there yet.’ You can’t forget who you are and what you truly want.

And winning is what you want to do. Gratitude helps you remember why you got into this, to begin with. It’s not about being cool or winning for any other reason — like picking up Twitter followers or anything like that. Who cares about that? If you care about those things, they will steer you away from your true goal.

Gratitude and humility are blood brothers

Gratitude and humility go hand-in-hand. Those two terms are going to help an individual become the best he can be. Because if you’re grateful, you’re humble. You’re always seeking a better way and seeking to improve. You’re willing to be coached, explains Sanderson.

That’s not a common trait. “I coach college wrestling and I have been in the sport my entire life”‘ says Sanderson. “There’s a lot of different levels of coachability. Our best kids are the ones who buy in the most. It means you think of others, you think about the team.”

References:

  1. https://test.statecollege.com/the-word-on-coaching-penn-states-cael-sanderson-on-gratitude/

The Great Benefits and Joy of Movement

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“Anytime you engage in regular activity, you’re becoming this version of yourself that is more hopeful, more motivated, more energized, and better able to connect with others.” ~Kelly McGonigal, Ph.D.

Knowing only great benefits and happiness will result from movement, why are Americans so resistant to making movement a priority in their day?

While our brains and bodies reward us for moving and exertion, we also are built with an instinct to avoid overexertion, conserve energy, to rest, to avoid discomfort, and avoid failure and embarrassment, says Kelly McGonigal, Ph.D., a research psychologist, a lecturer at Stanford University, and an award-winning science writer and author of The Joy of Movement.

To retrain our bodies to encourage movement, we must first start with self-compassion and the practice of gratitude. We must remove the negative connotations from movement and recognize how the practice of movement can be really rewarding on its own.

“Exercise is health-enhancing and life-extending, yet many of us feel it’s a chore.” Kelly McGonigal

Research shows, according to Dr. McGonigal, there are three motivations that keep people moving:

  • Enjoyment – doing something you actually enjoy
  • The activity provides social community or sense of identity (i.e. “I’m a runner”), … positive social connection, and
  • It’s a personal challenge and meaningful to you as you’re making progress toward a goal.

If you can find an activity that gives you all three – you’re hooked for life! Exercise is health-enhancing and life-extending, yet many of us feel it’s a chore and burden.

Movement can be a source of joy and is intertwined with some of the most basic human joys, including self-expression, social connection, and mastery–and why it is a powerful antidote to the modern epidemics of depression, anxiety, and loneliness.

Basically, bliss can be found in any sustained physical activity, whether that’s hiking, swimming, cycling, dancing, or yoga. However, the runner’s high emerges only after a significant effort. It seems to be the brain’s way of rewarding you for working hard.

McGonigal tells the stories of people who have found fulfillment and belonging through running, walking, dancing, swimming, weightlifting, and more, with examples that span the globe.

Along the way, Dr. McGonigal paints a portrait of human nature that highlights our capacity for hope, cooperation, and self-transcendence.

Movement is integral to both our happiness and our humanity. By harnessing the power of movement, you can create happiness, meaning, and connection in your life.

The latest theory about the runner’s high claims that: Our ability to experience exercise-induced euphoria is linked to our earliest ancestors’ lives as hunters, scavengers, and foragers.

As biologist Dennis Bramble and paleoanthropologist Daniel Lieberman write, “Today, endurance running is primarily a form of exercise and recreation, but its roots may be as ancient as the origin of the human genus.”

The neurochemical state that makes running gratifying may have originally served as a reward to keep early humans hunting and gathering. What we call the runner’s high may even have encouraged our ancestors to cooperate and share the spoils of a hunt.

In our evolutionary past, humans may have survived in part because physical activity was pleasurable. It takes about six weeks of consistent moderate movement to see structural and neurochemical changes in your brain. And, increase intensity amplifies the benefits. The harder stuff seems to payoff. Exercise gets easier and more pleasurable sooner.

The key to unlocking the runner’s high is not the physical action of running itself, but can be achieved on continuous moderate intensity exercise. And in fact scientists have documented a similar increase in endocannabinoids from cycling, walking on a treadmill at an incline, and outdoor hiking.

If you want the high, you just have to put in the time and effort. 

References:

  1. https://getmadefor.com/blogs/perspective/the-joy-of-movement-how-looking-backwards-moves-us-forward
  2. https://www.amazon.com/Joy-Movement-exercise-happiness-connection/dp/0525534105/ref=nodl

Kelly McGonigal, Ph.D., is a research psychologist, a lecturer at Stanford University, and an award-winning science writer and author of The Joy of Movement.

Attitude of Gratitude Tips

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“Gratitude heals, energizes, and transforms lives.” Robert Emmons, Ph.D.

How often do you feel thankful for the good things in your life? Studies suggest that making a habit of noticing what’s going well in your life and practicing gratitude could have wealth, health and emotional well-being benefits, according to the National Institute (NIH) of Health News in Health.

The author of “The Millionaire Mind”, Dr. Thomas J. Stanley, tells a terrific story of meeting with several former University of Alabama football players of the legendary Coach Paul ‘Bear’ Bryant, who were all successful business owners and senior executives in companies.  Dr. Stanley asked questions of the former football players. Instead of asking the typical questions, the author asked a simple very focused question.  What is the first thing you learned from Coach Bryant.  All of the former players tell a similar story:

On the first day of football practice, Coach Bryant asked them one question. “Have you called your parents to thank them?” He then says, “None of you got here on your own.  It required your parents to sacrifice many days taking you to little league practices, school, and feeding you and ensuring that you could play football and ultimately be on this team.  None of us got here on our own and we will not win on our own.”

The message from coach Bryant was clear.  You must have an ‘attitude of gratitude’ and realize we all need each other to get where we want to go.

Consequently, the millionaires in the study discussed within the book, “The Millionaire Mind”, agreed with coach Bryant’s assertion. To be successful and to successfully build wealth, you should have an ‘attitude of gratitude’.

Gratitude has two key components, according to Robert Emmons, Ph.D., Director, The Greater Good Science Center at the University of California, Berkeley, and perhaps the world’s leading scientific expert on gratitude.

  • “It’s an affirmation of goodness.” Gratitude permits you “to affirm that there are good things in the world, gifts and benefits” you’ve received.
  • It “…recognizes that the sources of this goodness are outside of yourself … You acknowledge that other people—or even higher powers, if you’re of a spiritual mindset—gave you many gifts, big and small, to help you achieve the goodness in your life.”

The social dimension of gratitude is especially important. It requires you to see how you’ve been “supported and affirmed by other people”. In other words, the grateful person accepts all of life as a precious gift. It does not mean that everything that occurs in life is pleasant and good…bad things and problems will continue to occur in your life. Instead, it implies that we are grateful for both life’s problems (or challenges) and life’s blessings.

Because gratitude encourages us not only to appreciate gifts but to repay them (or pay them forward), the sociologist Georg Simmel called it “the moral memory of mankind.” This is how gratitude may have evolved: by strengthening bonds between members of the same species who mutually helped each other out.

Taking the time to feel gratitude can improve your wealth, health and emotional well-being by helping you cope with stress. Research suggests that a daily practice of gratitude could affect the body, too. For example, one study found that gratitude was linked to fewer signs of chronic inflammation and heart disease.

When life gets challenging, it can be difficult to focus on all the good things we have to be thankful for. Our brains are hardwired to consider the worst possible scenario and remember negative experiences to avoid pain and stay safe.

Gratitude is one way to counteract our natural bias towards negativity and to boost happiness and overall well-being.

The first step in any gratitude practice is to reflect on and appreciate the good things that have happened or are happening in your life. These can be big or little things. It can be as simple as finding a good parking space in your workplace garage or enjoying a cup of Starbucks coffee. Or, perhaps you feel grateful for a close friend’s unexpected cellphone call or compassionate support.

Next, allow yourself a moment to enjoy and appreciate that you had the positive experience, no matter what problems may exist in your life. Focus on and embrace the positive feelings of gratitude.

“We encourage people to try practicing gratitude daily,” advises Dr. Judith T. Moskowitz, a psychologist at Northwestern University. “You can try first thing in the morning or right before you fall asleep, whatever is best for you.”

When you make gratitude a regular habit, it can help you learn to recognize good things in your life despite the bad things and problems that might be happening.

The bottomline is to create positive emotions by being thankful and practicing gratitude every day by following these tips:

  • Take a moment. Think about the positive things that happened during the day.
  • Joy it Down in a Gratitude Journal. Make a habit of writing down things you’re grateful for. Try listing 3 to 5 things for thirty days.
  • Savor and be thankful for your experiences. Try to notice positive moments as they are happening.
  • Relive the good times. Relive positive moments later by thinking about them or sharing them with others.
  • Write to someone. Write a letter to someone you feel thankful toward. You don’t have to send it.
  • Make a visit. Tell someone you’re grateful for them in person.

In short, gratitude heals, energizes, and transforms lives, says Emmons. Religions and philosophies have long embraced gratitude as an indispensable manifestation of virtue, and an integral component of health, wholeness, and well-being.

References:

  1. Stanley, Ph.D, Thomas J., (August 2, 2001), The Millionaire Mind, Kansas City: Andrews McMeel Publishing
  2. https://newsinhealth.nih.gov/2019/03/practicing-gratitude
  3. https://selfdevelopmentaddict.com/2014/12/20/the-millionaire-mind-book-summarynotes/
  4. https://healthmatters.idaho.gov/an-attitude-of-gratitude/

An Inspirational Story of Kindness

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“It’s amazing, how one person’s act of kindness can change the course of your life. Today, follow their lead….Pay it forward.”

“I went to Kroger tonight wearing one of my husband’s sweatshirts. I got in line to check out and the man in front of me asked if the sweatshirt was mine.

I said ‘oh no, it’s my husband’s.’ It caught me pretty off guard, to say the least. He then asked if my husband was with me so he could say thank you and I just said ‘thank you, but unfortunately, he’s deployed right now.’

The man then, without hesitation started putting my groceries up on the belt with his and told me he was paying for my groceries tonight. I was speechless.

The only thing I could get out was, ‘oh my gosh, are you sure, thank you so much’ almost a dozen times. He said, ‘that place over there almost took me away from my wife and my four kids.

Promise you’ll stay true and honest to him while he’s gone and love him like you’ve never loved him before when he gets home.’ I’m still in shock over an hour later.

There’s still so much good in the world and we need to start focusing on that rather than focusing on all the bad.“

Credit: Casey Carpenter

An Attitude of Gratitude

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“Be in a state of gratitude for everything that shows up in your life. Be thankful for the storms as well as the smooth sailing. What is the lesson or gift in what you are experiencing right now? Find your joy not in what’s missing in your life but in how you can serve.” Wayne Dyer

Gratitude is the quality of being thankful. It’s a readiness to show appreciation

Gratitude is a foundational element to building wealth. Gratitude allows you to find joy in and focus on what you already have because envy is the stealer of wealth and comparison is the thief of joy.  If you are constantly comparing yourself to others you will never have enough. You will feel empty and inadequate. You will not find happiness.

As media mogul Oprah Winfrey explains, “Be thankful for what you have; you’ll end up having more. If you concentrate on what you don’t have, you will never, ever have enough.”

“Gratitude turns what you have into enough.” Unknown

“Mother Theresa talked about how grateful she was to the people she was helping, the sick and dying in the slums of Calcutta, because they enabled her to grow and deepen her spirituality,” explains Robert A. Emmons, Ph.D., is the world’s leading scientific expert on gratitude and professor of psychology at the University of California, Davis.

Like Mother Theresa’s spiritual growth, there are several important reasons that gratitude can have transformative effects on your own life, according to Dr. Emmons. Additionally, there are four effects he sites:

1. Gratitude allows you to appreciate and celebrate the present. It magnifies positive emotions.

Research on emotion shows that positive emotions wear off quickly. Our emotional system likes newness and novelty. It likes change. You adapt to positive life circumstances so that before too long, the new car, the new spouse, the new house—they don’t feel so new and exciting anymore.

But gratitude makes you focus on and appreciate the value of something, and when you appreciate the value of something, you extract more benefits from it; you’re less likely to take it for granted, states Dr. Emmons.

In effect, gratitude allows you to participate more in life. You notice the positives more, and that magnifies the pleasures you get from life. Instead of adapting to goodness, you celebrate goodness. You spend more time watching and doing things with gratitude. Effectively, you become a greater participant in your life as opposed to being a spectator.

2. Gratitude blocks toxic, negative emotions, such as envy, resentment, regret—emotions that can destroy our happiness. A 2008 study by psychologist Alex Wood in the Journal of Research in Personality, showed that gratitude can reduce the frequency and duration of episodes of depression.

You cannot feel envious and grateful at the same time. They’re incompatible feelings. If you’re grateful, you can’t resent someone for having something that you don’t.

3. Grateful people are more stress resistant. There’s a number of studies showing that in the face of serious trauma, adversity, and suffering, if people have a grateful disposition, they’ll recover more quickly. In short, gratitude gives people a perspective from which they can interpret negative life events and help them guard against post-traumatic stress and lasting anxiety.

4. Grateful people have a higher sense of self-worth. When you’re grateful, you have the sense that someone else is looking out for you—someone else has provided for your well-being, or you notice a network of relationships, past and present, of people who are responsible for helping you get to where you are right now.

Once you start to recognize the contributions that other people have made to your life—once you realize that other people have seen the value in you—you can transform the way you see yourself.

Thus, it’s imperative for you to cultivate gratitude and to overcome the challenges to gratitude. You must put conscious and deliberate effort into practicing gratitude.

“Gratitude is the healthiest of all human emotions. The more you express gratitude for what you have, the more likely you will have even more to express gratitude for.” Zig Ziglar

First is to keep a gratitude journal as a way to cultivate gratitude, says Dr. Emmons. This can mean listing just five things for which you’re grateful every week. This practice works because it consciously, intentionally focuses your attention on developing more grateful thinking and on eliminating ungrateful thoughts. It helps guard against taking things for granted; instead, you will see gifts in life as new and exciting. People who live a life of pervasive thankfulness really do experience life differently than people who cheat themselves out of life by not feeling grateful.

Another gratitude exercise is to practice counting your blessings on a regular basis, maybe first thing in the morning, maybe in the evening. What are you grateful for today? You don’t have to write them down on paper.

Additionally, you can use concrete reminders to practice gratitude, says Dr. Emmons. For example, a Vancouver family developed a practice of putting money in “gratitude jars.” At the end of the day, they put spare change into those gratitude jars. They had a regular reminder, a habit, to get them to focus on gratitude. When the jar became full, they gave away the money to a good cause within their community.

Gratitude journals and other gratitude practices seem simple and basic, but studies have shown that people who keep gratitude journals for just three weeks realize results that have been overwhelmingly beneficial in their lives, according to Dr. Emmons.

The bottomline is that having an ‘attitude of gratitude’ is the key ingredient to living your best and most rewarding life. It’s a practice and habit that we must all embrace.

“The ultimate path to enlightment is the cultivation of gratitude. When you’re grateful, fear disappears. When you’re grateful lack disapears. You feel a sense that life is uniquely blessed, but at the same time, you feel like you’re a part of everything that exists and you know that you are not the source of it.” Tony Robbins

References:

  1. https://greatergood.berkeley.edu/article/item/why_gratitude_is_good
  2. https://thestrive.co/gratitude-quotes/
  3. https://blog.gratefulness.me/gratitude-quotes/

Robert A. Emmons, Ph.D., is the world’s leading scientific expert on gratitude. He is a professor of psychology at the University of California, Davis, and the founding editor-in-chief of The Journal of Positive Psychology. He is the author of the books Gratitude Works!: A 21-Day Program for Creating Emotional Prosperity and Thanks! How the New Science of Gratitude Can Make You Happier.